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Dark Shadows

Dark Shadows

Comedy · Fantasy · 2012

Vampire Barnabas Collins is inadvertently freed from his tomb and emerges into the very changed world of 1972. He returns to Collinwood Manor to find that his once-grand estate and family have fallen into ruin.

Movie details

Dark Shadows

“Every family has its demons.”

2012 Comedy · Fantasy 1h 53m

Critical arithmetic

One number, for now.

TMDB

6.1 / 10

Community rating

Vampire Barnabas Collins is inadvertently freed from his tomb and emerges into the very changed world of 1972. He returns to Collinwood Manor to find that his once-grand estate and family have fallen into ruin.

CriticWise case file

What this film says about your taste.

Not a recommendation score. A measure of how closely the film’s taste signals resemble yours.

The archetype split

Who fights over Dark Shadows?

The split comes from the same five-axis model used by the test, not audience ratings or review sentiment.

Taste neighbourhood

Nearby on the taste map.

TMDB supplies the candidates. CriticWise reorders them by craft, strangeness, prestige, emotion, and pace.

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Rose, a rebellious half-vampire/half-human guardian-in-training and her best friend, Lissa -- a mortal, royal vampire Princess - have been on the run when they are captured and returned to St. Vladamirs Academy, the very place where they believe their lives may be in most jeopardy. Rose will sacrifice everything to protect Lissa from those who intend to exploit her from within the Academy walls and the Strigoi (immortal, evil vampires) who hunt her kind from outside its sanctuary.

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

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After a family tragedy, three generations of the Deetz family return home to Winter River. Still haunted by Betelgeuse, Lydia's life is turned upside down when her teenage daughter, Astrid, accidentally opens the portal to the Afterlife.

Cinderfella

Cinderfella

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When his father dies, poor Fella is left at the mercy of his snobbish stepmother and her two no-good sons Maximilian and Rupert. As he slaves away for his nasty step-family, Maximilian and Rupert attempt to find a treasure Fella's father has supposedly hidden on the estate. Hoping to restore her dwindling fortunes, the stepmother plans a fancy ball in honor of the visiting Princess Charmein whom she hopes will marry Rupert. Eventually, Fella's Fairy Godfather shows up to convince him that he has a shot at winning the Princess himself.

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Blackbeard's Ghost

Blackbeard's Ghost

Comedy · 1968

The eponymous wraith returns to Earth to aid his descendant, elderly Emily Stowecroft. The villains want to kick Emily and her friends out of their group home so that they can build a crooked casino. Good guy Steve Walker gets caught in the middle of the squabble after evoking Blackbeard's ghost.

Where it lives

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Names above the title

The people responsible.

Directed by

Tim Burton

Written by

Seth Grahame-Smith · John August

Johnny Depp

Johnny Depp

Barnabas Collins

Michelle Pfeiffer

Michelle Pfeiffer

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard

Eva Green

Eva Green

Angelique Bouchard

Helena Bonham Carter

Helena Bonham Carter

Dr. Julia Hoffman

Chloë Grace Moretz

Chloë Grace Moretz

Carolyn Stoddard

Bella Heathcote

Bella Heathcote

Victoria Winters / Josette DuPres

Gulliver McGrath

Gulliver McGrath

David Collins

Court is in session

Put Dark Shadows on trial.

Two incompatible taste archetypes. One film. Read the arguments, then issue a completely binding cultural ruling.

The defence The Popcorn Loyalist

“It owes the canon nothing.”

The movie pursues immediacy and audience pleasure without begging institutions to certify its worth.

The prosecution The Big-Idea Head

“Easy pleasure, short half-life.”

It moves efficiently through the moment but offers little reason to keep arguing once the credits end.